This girl has 9 lives

It has taken me a long time to even talk about this because every time I even think about it, I go into an anxiety attack. What could have happened, should have happened and the outcome. I was driving back from Tuscaloosa, Alabama a few weeks ago after attending the Purdue/Alabama basketball game. It had been raining and I had been driving extra careful because I knew I needed new tires on my car. I was about 30 minutes outside of Atlanta on I-20, when I hit a patch of standing water going from rough pavement onto smooth pavement. As soon as I saw the water, I knew . . . and that's all she wrote, sister. I was hydroplaning, skidding sideways down the median, through the mud and ending up in the middle lane of the opposite direction with oncoming traffic. By the grace of god, one car was in the middle lane. I remember it all happening so slowly but fast too. The car saw me, I saw him and we both swerved at the same time. I moved to the shoulder of road, shaken and just sitting there trying to assess what had just happened. After that one car, there was no traffic until a few minutes and then just a whole wall of traffic came. What's weird was, while it was all happening, I was calm, and really at peace thinking well if this is how it ends, there is nothing I can do about it. I felt like I was in a dream and to this day, I can't really wrap my head around it. It could have ended so differently, but it didn't. Other than mud being jam packed in my door well and all over my car, it came out unscathed. So I keep asking myself, am I suppose to have had an epiphany? Did this happen for a reason? Am I suppose to somehow find a new calling, become a better person because of this? And then, I say... nahhh, I'm still a crabby old lady who gets irritated by everyone. I am one lucky girl though and I know it. It could have turned out a whole lot different . . .but it didn't!